Mother-in-law forces bride to take wedding pictures against her will, groom sides with his mother: 'He said let him down by making such a fuss over a normal part of weddings'

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Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Oct 6, 2024 6:00 PM EDT

We've all heard of bridezillas, and some of us have encountered them in real life. It's easy to think of a bridezilla as an unrepentant and unreasonable monster who wants it her way or the highway, no matter how unreasonable her way is. While those brides do exist, it's much more likely for a bride to be unreasonable for a reason that's sympathetic if you know the context. Maybe a million family members are whispering in her ear, telling her that her wedding has to be perfect, or else. She might've spent her life's savings on this one day, and anything short of exactly what she wants would feel like an absurd waste of money. Or perhaps she's feeling bad about her self-image and doesn't want there to be photos of her big day because of how insecure she's feeling. As unusual as it sounds, the latter scenario is what happened to this bride. 

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10412762624
    via photo nic

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITA for telling my husband he and his mother ruined out wedding day for me?
    via u/Salt-Swing8252
  • 03
    I (35F) got married to my husband (M41) recently. Neither of us like the spotlight so agreed on a small event. The only thing I was firm about was I didn't want photos. My self esteem is in the toilet. In the last 18months I have put on weight. I am not looking to make excuses but there are some reasons why.
    via u/Salt-Swing8252
  • 04
    1. In the last 18moths I have lost both parents and my grandmother. I have lost 2 jobs and had a miscarriage. I has hit me hard at times and I have been comfort eating. 2. I was put on a new medication and weight gain is a side effect. 3. About a year ago I broke my left ankle badly. I have had 3 surgeries to date (the last one was 10days before the wedding). I can't walk without pain
    via u/Salt-Swing8252
  • 05
    I really didn't want photos that would remind me of the fact I am now fat. Few weeks before the wedding my mother in law is talking about going to a local beauty spot for photos. I say no thank you and that yes I am being serious. My husband hears this and later that night I say again I really don't want photos and he says that is fine with him. Week before the wedding I am having the same conversation with MIL and my husband.
    via u/Salt-Swing8252
  • 06
    Day of the wedding my FIL and MIL pick us up. I am no longer able to drive as I can't move my ankle. We get the whole legal shindig done and as we are going back to the car MIL again says let's go to the beauty spot for photos. I again so no but she tells FIL to drive there and my husband just sits there.l know I gave him "the look" but total silence. Long story short the photos are taken and we head back.
    via u/Salt-Swing8252
  • 07
    In the car driving home my MIL starts showing me the photos and I hate myself in them. I look like a pile of fat . I look ridiculous in a dress with a medical boot and I can't stop the tears rolling down my cheeks. This upsets my mother in law and there is an atmosphere the whole rest of the day. I really tried to move on, but I had to get out of that stupid dress and all I really just wanted to hide away.
    via u/Salt-Swing8252
  • 08
    Privately I told my husband him and his mother ruined our wedding day for me because all I can think of is those pictures. He said he didn't realise I was so serious about no photos, that it's only for his mum to keep and that he thinks I look beautiful. I told him that not 30mins into our marriage he totally let me down and I don't know if I am beyond hurt or furious.
    via u/Salt-Swing8252
  • 09
    He said I was being ridiculous and that I let him down by making such a fuss over a "normal part of weddings". He also said I had hurt his mother (she has some mental health issues and has been obsessing over me crying on my wedding day) and that I need to reassure her she hasn't done anything wrong.
    via u/Salt-Swing8252
  • 10
    I told him no and there will be serious problems if he tries telling her otherwise because as far as I am concerned they both totally ignored my one request and that was unacceptable. He thinks I am being a totally unreasonable AH. So am I being an AH reddit?
    via u/Salt-Swing8252
  • 11
    _s1m0n_s3z Why did you get out of the car at the beauty spot? I'd have sat there until everyone gave up. NTA. Bulldozer MiL deserves all the bad feels she's feeling. She up, putting her selfish wants ahead of the done bride's.
    via u/_s1m0n_s3z
  • 12
    heatherlincoln This, op is blaming the husband and MIL but she got out of the car, went to the spot, posed and allowed the photos to be taken. Take some accountability.
    via u/heatherlincoln
  • 13
    heeden Right because it's impossible for someone in a vulnerable position to get brow-beaten into doing something they don't want...
    via u/heeden
  • 14
    Brilliant_Lopsided Victim blaming much? Just because she's in the photos doesn't mean she was put there willingly. Sounds to me like she was coerced and manipulated into doing so.
    via u/Brilliant_Lopsided
  • 15
    Apprehensive War9612 Why did you get married right now? What was pressing? You don't seem enthused to be getting married. It sounds like you're dealing with on top of your physical health concerns. So why get married in a dress you do not like, in a surgical boot, 10 days after surgery? That's the reason you didn't want pics. Because you didn't want to get married. ESH
    via u/Apprehensive_War9612
  • 16
    HeatherAnne1975 This is what I was thinking, why did they have to get married now? It seemed like a simple ceremony, no big party was planned, what was the urgency? Also OP is treating this wedding like a chore. There was zero excitement or happiness about getting married coming through the post. I get that OP is depressed. But it was her husbands wedding too. His feelings do but seem to be considered at all.
    via u/HeatherAnne1975
  • 17
    Drama_Pumpkin Then he has to communicate it to her like an adult BEFORE the wedding. Should not LIE to her that he's ok with it and coerce her into something she doesn't want in the last minute. That's extremely manipulative. Those who love and respect their partner truly will NOT do it that way. Only those who doesn't care about the partner's feelings and only want to make sure things go by their way BY ANY MEANS will act like that. It's not about just wedding photos. It's about lying and manip
    via u/Drama_Pumpkin
  • 18
    He clearly knows she doesn't want to take pictures - what does he even mean by saying he thought she isn't serious?! If it's not maliciously manipulative then I don't know what it is. He's making it as her fault now. As if she didn't let him know that she was serious. How could she be more serious than this? She told 'no for photos' multiple times and not once he said, "but I want wedding photos" but went along with it. And now saying he thought she didn't mean it?! Seriously, it's very concerni
    via u/Drama_Pumpkin
  • 19
    With already having so much and mental health issues along with the wedding stress, without having any support system there and her own husband being against her, I'd understand why she gave into the pressure of MIL and got out of the car to took those photos. This isn't the way to go about how it's his wedding too. What he showed is nothing but a sly manipulative behaviour and it's horrible.
    via u/Drama_Pumpkin

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bride groom wedding drama Crazy Brides mother wedding mother in law wedding dress reddit thread Reddit professional wedding photography weddings wedding photos
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